Relationships that Work

Someone asked one day, “How do you become so successful in all you do?” Well, I’m not sure how successful I am, but the secret to any success that I have ever had is… “I get along with people…for long periods of time.” I look at every person that I meet as a potential life-long friend. This usually ends up being a positive experience and adds to the potential of having success.

That means I had to overlook their faults, forgive their wrongs toward me, and never let hate enter into my heart. Actor Will Smith made this comment; “Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” Love lasts when the relationship comes first! Work on it.

The key to having successful relationships in any area is to have complete obedience to the Word of God. The word “relationship” means to be connected by blood or by marriage. Both of these denote covenants. We are in covenant relationship with the Lord through His blood and we are His bride. We are in covenant relationship with our spouses by marriage. We are in covenant relationship with our families by blood. We are in covenant relationship with the body of Christ through Jesus’ blood.

If we look at friendships as “covenants” we sense the importance of holding up our end of the relationship. That is extremely important in marriage. Having been married for 42 years now I notice how faithfully my wife, Charlene, keeps her covenant with me and how I strive to keep my covenant with her. The same goes with my children and grandchildren, we all have a sense that we are bound to love and serve one another.

Matthew 26:28 – “This is the blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sin.” (NIV)

God honored His part of the covenant with mankind by sending Christ into the world to “pour out His blood” for us. Wow! So what is my part? To faithfully serve Him, honor Him in all I do, and fulfill the mission He gave me in life to accomplish. I have to work at keeping my part of the covenant with God…it is not always easy.

Note: Relationships take years to cultivate, and if we are not “maintaining” and growing in relationship, they can be destroyed in a few moments. This means we work on them during the good and bad times. You learn to like someone when you can laugh together, but you can never really know deeper love until you have cried together. When you share common joy it’s great, but when you endure common sorrow together it is wonderful…in the end.

There are lots of ways to maintain strong relationships but the two most important things I think are; Faithfulness and consistent honesty.

As I look at friends and loved ones that I have deep relationships with for many years I have learned that their faithfulness and honesty with me means the most. This is the way we walk in relationship with each other. If we lie or are unfaithful to each other, we don’t deserve the relationship. I have noticed that even great men and women carry with them the burden of bad relationships. How much greater could their lives be if those relationships were healed. Most of the broken relationships are a result of unfaithfulness or dishonesty.

RELATIONSHIP WITH THE LORD: We are to “walk” in relationship with Him.

Our relationship with the Lord was intended to be like that of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden before they fell. They walked and talked with God face to face. They had a personal and physical relationship with the Lord, but when they sinned mankind was separated from God, removed from the presence of the Lord and from direct access to the blessings of God. They broke covenant by being unfaithful and then lying about it and it affected us all. But, the Lord didn’t give up on us! Through His Son Jesus, God put into motion His plan to redeem us back to Him!

This is how we can express true and faithful relationship with Jesus.

Love the Lord: Christian love has God for its primary object and expresses itself first of all in implicit obedience to his commandments. All of the law is fulfilled in one word: LOVE! Matthew 22:37 – “…Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.” I Peter 1:8 – “Whom having not seen, ye love…“

Just to give the Lord our hearts is not enough–we need to unite our whole being, heart, mind, and soul, in order to love the Lord the way he wants us to. We should express our love to the Lord by loving His word and His people. Knowing his commandments in our heads is not enough, we must keep them in our hearts also. David, in Psalms said: “your law is within my heart,” “I delight in your Law.” And we should serve one another as we walk in the Love of God.

John 14:23 – “If a man love me, he will keep my words My Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.” We live our lives in covenant with God according to His word and our relationship with Him will grow and flourish. If we continually violate what we know to be the word and will of God, our relationship with Him will wane and grow increasingly cold. On the other hand, when we walk according to His word, we have joy and closeness with the Almighty.

Bottom line – Be faithful to God, the Church and to your love ones and you will have success everywhere you go in life. At least that’s what I believe.