Billy Hornsby

Avoiding Heresy in the next big movement.

June 27th, 2009

Ever hear some religious teacher say, “God is doing a new thing”? They talk about the new revelation that they just received that will change the church forever and make everything better. Well, most of the time these kinds of new ideas, especially when expressed by popular leaders, get all kinds of press, books are written and conferences are held to promote them, then they fade away into obscurity. Sounds familiar? These movements will garner support by many other well know leaders and then thousands will begin to follow them, then they begin to fall apart…one misinterpretation after the other…one over emphasis after the other…one subtle heretical idea after the other. People are left reeling with confusion and lose their faith in leadership and many drop out altogether. How do we avoid falling headlong into these traps? Read on.

1. Stay in the Word! The Bible is the source of truth and the soul authority in matters of doctrine and church matters. The Word will never let you down, lead you astray or confuse the issues. The problem is when people have a “private or personal” interpretation of scripture things go awry and heresy triumphs. Be careful of these interpretations that are extra-scriptural (can’t be found there) or lead to one extreme or the other.

2. Stay connected to the “Body of Christ.” Most movements that embrace a heretical private revelation also move away from the established church. Granted, the established church in many cases has moved away from scripture and biblical authority…BUT MOST HAVE NOT. So we can’t discount the whole church for the wanderings and failure of some. Heresy gets rooted and grounded in smaller groups that become fanatical and obsessed with the “heavy revvy” of it all. Stay connected to the established church. It is absolutely necessary to HEAR OTHER VOICES besides the one with a new interpretation or revelation.

3. Stay close to Jesus. If we stay intimately yoked with Christ, He can speak into our lives. The Holy Spirit still speaks to the hearts of men and women to help us discern the words we hear whether they are truth or lies. If you sense that what you are hearing, no matter how intriguing, is a “little off,” it probably is. Go to Jesus and ask Him…ask the Holy Spirit to reveal it to you in scripture and in your heart. Can’t go wrong here.

4. Stay humble. When you think that you are to sole possessor of “this new truth” and close your heart to learn or be corrected by others, you will fall into the trap of heresy. Lone rangers with so called “new and great revelations” that are extra-biblical are sure to hurt themselves and all that follow. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. Humble yourself and let older wiser leaders speak into your heart….and listen.

There’s probably more to say about this….so chime in…give me your thoughts and wisdom on this.

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People Wise

June 2nd, 2009

On a flight to Tulsa, Oklahoma in September, 2008 I met a distinguished looking man that had an interesting perspective of what the church should be. He was dressed up in a suit, 79 years old and looked to be highly educated…he was. He had spent over 40 years of his life in a Christian University first as a teacher then as an administrator. As we began to talk I found out what church he was a part of. He insisted that they were not a denomination, had no headquarters, and that each church, over 8000 of them nationwide, were totally independent of any organization. This interested me.

I shared that I was also in the “church” business and that our group, I avoided using the “O” (organization) word, planted churches around the USA. I also mentioned that one of our churches was listed as the fastest growing church in the USA. Immediately he said, “We are not charismatic!” He went on to explain that charismatic style churches were very fast growing with their style but that they, his group of churches, were fine with the smaller congregations that made up the many independent churches that he associated with.

Then he made a statement to me that sums up the kind of church that most people today have quit going to. He said, “We are not charismatic, we do not entertain people, and we don’t do community service. We just teach the Bible and that’s all we do.”

Let me interpret that for you. From further discussion I understood these four distinctions about his church.

1. They did not believe that spiritual gifts were for today.

2. They did not have a live band that provided music.

3. They did not try to grow their churches by reaching out to the needs of the people in the community.

4. They only preached the Bible…that’s it.

This would be the antithesis of people-wise. This is not understanding a modern culture that thrives on entertainment, desires that someone understand their felt needs and wants an encounter with a real God and His spirit. This culture wants a church that “lives” the Bible.

Relevant?

We often use the words “relevant” and “authentic” to describe our approach to ministry. They are good words…howbeit a little overused. What I think we are trying to say is, we are “people-wise.” People-wise in the sense that we understand that people have had a problem relating to the old school church. The church of pews and hymnals, religion and tradition and same ole same ole just isn’t drawing new people or holding members anymore. Church just doesn’t seem to fit into the cultural needs of modern people so they just stop coming. They stop coming by the millions.

On Sunday mornings over 13 million Christians who use to attend services are now absent. They are saying “yes” to Jesus but “no” to church.

How does this fare with Great Commission? The local church, with its Sunday services, has been the great evangelistic arm of the church for centuries. Small groups are also a great part of that effort. But most successful small group ministries are a result of the harvest on Sunday mornings. If Christians quit church, who will bring the lost to hear the Gospel? A bigger question is, “How can we make the church more people-wise so that Christians will come back?”

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Full but not Fulfilled

May 27th, 2009

These days it is not too hard to find great life-giving churches. I speak at one nearly every week of my life. They are exciting, engaging and full of the life of God. What God is doing is amazing in these days and we should thank Him daily for providing the world with real God-life opportunities.

But the perception of church is not what I am experiencing at all in the minds of the majority of Americans. Many think that church is still the boring, uninteresting and non-engaging “service” of their parents and grandparents. And there are reason why they perceive church to be this way. Look at the seven reasons they come to church but are disappointed when they leave.

Seven reasons why Christians and others go to church and are not fulfilled.

1. They only go out of Duty – “We were raised in church and we just do it because you are supposed to.” Though not bad to go out of duty, if there is the lack of desire to find fulfillment it can grow old really fast. Duty will only do so much to keep you in church.

2. They only go out of Habit – “It is what I have always done. Sundays are for church, I have done it so long I guess it is just a habit” Habits can be changed and people change their church going habits on a regular basis these days.

3. Friendship – “Church is where my friends gather each week. I love the relationships.” Now this is a great reason to come to church. However, if this is the only time you get to see your friends, you will focus on the friendships more than what you can get from God on Sunday. (hence the need for small groups.)

4. Hope – “I guess I am looking for something that will make my life better and give me hope in these difficult times.” If I am coming for this reason, i better find that something. Church is the last resort where people go sometimes to find answers to life’s toughest challenges.

5. Understanding – “My motivation is to try to find some understanding of my life and what it all means.” Living a meaningful life is absolutely vital to happiness and fulfillment. Let the church be where is all starts!

6. Purpose – “My main reason is to find purpose for living. There has to be more to life than just working and recreation.” Many people have found success in business and other pursuits yet feel they have no purpose. What could be a greater purpose than the cause of Christ.

7. God – “Church is my weekly connection to God. I look forward to the chance to disconnect from the world and enter into the spiritual realm.” This is a great goal for attending church. It is the church’s responsibility to help people connect with God through worship, the Word, prayer and fellowship.

Life is full of good and bad stuff. It’s like eating pasta, you can sure fill up on a bowl of pasta yet in a couple of hours you start getting hungry again (at least I do….same with Chinese food). The stuff in life that fills us up, many times, is not fulfilling. It does not have the “spiritual nutrition” that we need to really make us feel that our lives are significant.

People are looking for fulfillment in their “church” and God experience. Too often they get full of sermons, full of religion, full of activities and are still empty… still hungry…. amazing.

I believe the answer can be found in Life-Giving churches…I believe every church ought to be a place that creates and gives life to all that come. I have dedicated the rest of my life to starting life-giving churches that can bring people to a place of fulfillment in their hopes and dreams, walk with God and family, and everyday life and existence. Let’s join together to see this become a reality.

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What’s in Your Wallet?

May 21st, 2009

What’s in your wallet?

What’s in your message? How do you as a Christian portray the God of Heaven? How is the Good News shared where you go to church? Is your God waiting to punish you or bless your socks off? This will make a difference in those that you talk with about God’s nature.

As in the Capital One Visa Card commercial, do you feel as if God is like a band of Viking looking barbarians pressing down on you about to take off your head if you don’t have His credit card? Or do you see God as a loving and forgiving God who wants to rescue you from a tormented or unfulfilled life? Do you carry His card?

For the life of me I can’t understand the legalistic message of so many churches today. Yes, God hates sin, He wants to eradicate it from the face of the earth. God is opposed to Satan and wants to take back for Himself all that the devil has stolen. And He has a plan to do so. That plan is for His church to tell the Good News about His redeeming grace to as many as will listen. A message that speaks only of all that is wrong and the subsequent penalty for that wrongdoing is not the Good News. It leaves the hearer with the wrong perspective of God.

It is equally erroneous not to warn the sinner of his way. The Bible is clear about the hopelessness of the unrepentant soul. But forgiveness and God’s desire for mankind to escape the consequences of their sins is the message. Christ alone offers this escape through the blood of His cross…nothing else. Not condemning, guilt casting, blame laying nor “hell if you don’t change before you leave this building,” is able to convert the wayward sinner to Christ.

Christ is the Hope!

People need hope. They need hope for finances, family, friendships, and forgiveness. They need hope and they need it now. Thank God for the Gospel of Hope!

We preach Christ crucified and raised from the dead for the hope of the world. Every need is met through the sacrifice of Christ and every issue that mankind faces is addressed and relieved in God’s word.

Being relevant means the church ministers at the level of people in their daily experience and lifts them up to the place where Christ sits…at the right hand of the Father on our behalf. He is our mediator, reconciling the world to God.

Hungry people need food, the depressed need a reason to live, the lonely need a friend. The destitute need a place and provision, and the tormented need deliverance. The unfulfilled need fulfillment and the insignificant need significance. This is where the people that Christ died for live. We focus on the place where people live and the place where the knowledge of Christ can bring them. Then we share the Gospel from this perspective and all that hear are helped.

The Christian needs a place to be built up, a place to bring family and friends to find fellowship and godly relationships, a place where grace and truth is offered and hope is lavishly dispensed every time the Word is brought. This is relevance…this is knowing people and what they need…this is giving it to them when they need it in a spirit of love and compassion.

What’s in your wallet? The Word of God that brings to light the plight of the sinner and the hope of forgiveness though the Cross of Christ…it is the answer to everything.

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An Atheist Led me to Christ!

May 17th, 2009

No kidding! This really happened…an atheist let me to Christ! I gave my life to Christ when I was 24 years old. But the journey started when I was a small kid.

At 10 years old I was standing at the ironing board pressing out the shirt I would wear that day. With six kids in the family it was difficult for Mama to get around to meeting all our individual needs. So, I was ironing my own clothes.

The ironing board was chest high and, not being proficient in ironing, the hot iron slipped off the board and fried my chest. I screamed and ran around the kitchen looking for some relief. I ran to the freezer and scraped some of the ice that had collected around the Freon coils. In the midst of my pain and agony, Mama said, “See, God punished you!”

God punished me? That’s right, that’s what I had been told all my life. “There is a God in Heaven that sees everything that you do wrong, and He will punish you for it.” It was the Gospel according to Mama, who by the way, was the most precious little Cajun Catholic woman that ever lived. Mama wasn’t a theologian, but she was a loving and devoted mother. As a matter of fact, Mama was the greatest influence in my life. But her theology wasn’t actually biblical, and as a result, neither was mine.

I spent the first 24 years of my life believing that the only reason that God existed was to look down from Heaven and take every opportunity availed to Him to punish me. He must have seen an opportunity when I was ironing my shirt. He zapped me! If Mama was trying to win me to the Lord, it didn’t work. However, I did have a healthy fear of God.

Growing up like I did, under Mama’s “God in Heaven” theology, kept me in Sunday Mass and helped me in some ways that I look back on and appreciate now, but it did not lead me to Christ. As a Catholic, I never found Christ. I prayed constantly, never missed Mass, didn’t curse and tried to be good. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t seem to please God. He kept on punishing me…according to Mama.

Then one day, many years later, as a Louisiana State Trooper, I met a man that claimed to be an atheist. This really messed me up. I got mad at the things he told me and the very thought that someone would not believe in God…even though my idea of God was wrong. He said he tried being a Baptist, a Catholic and even read the Bible and came to the conclusion that there was no God. Well, this made me mad. I knew there was a God in Heaven because how else could you explain all the times He punished me? So, I went on a quest to find God and prove Him to this atheist.

I did not own a Bible. However, My next door neighbor Barney did own one. And a Bible it was! He had this huge 20 pound Masonic Family Bible on his coffee table; I asked him if I could borrow it; he said yes; and I took it home and starting reading it…I was going to find out about God and convince this atheist of just how wrong he was.

While reading this huge bible I came across the following passages of scripture:

Deut: 1 “Now it shall come to pass, if you diligently obey the voice of the LORD your God, to observe carefully all His commandments which I command you today, that the LORD your God will set you high above all nations of the earth. 2 And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the LORD your God:

3 “Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the country.

4 “Blessed shall be the fruit of your body, the produce of your ground and the increase of your herds, the increase of your cattle and the offspring of your flocks.

5 “Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.

6 “Blessed shall you be when you come in, and blessed shall you be when you go out.

What? I couldn’t believe what I had just read. Blessed? God wanted to bless me? I knew He wanted to punish me but never that He wanted to bless me. Now, for the first time in my life I had the motivation to want to not only please God but to serve Him. To know a god that wants to bless me had to be the greatest experience mankind could have.

The impact of this truth drove me to my knees. I went to my bedroom fell to my knees and told God I was sorry for my sins and lifestyle and asked Him to forgive me. He did, and I left that room a new person. It was like 100 pounds of weight had just fallen from my shoulders.

Immediately I went to the Christian bookstore and bought my first bible. It was much later that I read in Romans 4:2, “Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?” KJV The goodness of God had led me to repentance and salvation.

After this incredible experience with the Living God, I went back to the State Police Training Academy and begin to witness to my atheist friend. I don’t know if he came to Christ, but over the years I have led many policeman to accept Christ as their Lord and Savior.

Simply reading my neighbor’s bible had produced faith in me…a faith that has carried me for over 35 years to serve Jesus Christ with a glad heart. This Word had guided my family and me for the majority of my life into fulfillment and significance. It still works today for anyone that will believe and obey it…even for an atheist.

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What do We do with the World?

May 15th, 2009

Look what the scripture says…..

2 Corinthians 6: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you. And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

WOW! “Light has no fellowship with darkness.” ”Come out from among them.” “touch not the unclean thing.” These are strong words from the Apostle Paul about our involvement with the world and the things of the world. BUT AREN’T WE SUPPOSE TO REACH THE WORLD FOR CHRIST? HOW THEN?

I believe the key word in this scripture is “Be not unequally yoked with unbelievers.” In our quest to reach the world for Christ we will have to befriend them, share life with them, share truth with them, and even put up with some of their worldliness…but we don’t have to yoke up to what they are yoked up to. After all, this is what Jesus set us free from.

What is socially acceptable to the world may not be acceptable to the Lord. The morals of the world, and the morals God has called us to live by are growing farther and farther apart. The laws of the Lord are being challenged daily in the courts of this land. Laws made by man are wrong if they contradict the laws of God. James 4:12 says, “There is only one Lawgiver and Judge…”

It is the desire of the world to be socially accepted by their peers. The pressure is great for young and old alike to be accepted, and they have to compromise their morals to maintain their social status. We as Christians do not have to subject ourselves to these pressures, but we are called by the Lord to a social relationship with those in the world. We are “in the world but not of the world“.

We are called to have compassion for each other as Christians, but we are also called to have compassion for those in the world. When Jesus fed the four thousand at the Sea of Galilee, he called his disciples together and said, “I have compassion for them…”

Lamentations 3:22 - “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.” We are compelled to reach out to a hurting world with the love of Jesus.

Christ had compassion for us and died on the cross to show that compassion. That same compassion that Christ showed for us was for ALL men. Christ has instructed us to have that same compassion for the world. It is this compassion, placed in us by God, that drives missionaries to go into all the world.

Jude 23:23 - “Be merciful to those who doubt; snatch others from the fire and save them; to others show mercy, mixed with fear, hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh.”

If we show compassion and mercy for those in the world the Lord will show compassion and mercy for us.

Matthew 5:7 - “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.”

Back to unequally yoked…The phrase “unequally yoked together” is the translation of just one Greek word, heterozugeo, which is a compound word that means, “to yoke up differently; to associate discordantly; unequally yoke together.” It is used but this one time in the Bible.

This is talking about lack of harmony because of conflicting lifestyles, views and convictions. We are admonished not to yoke up with the conflicting lifestyles and habits of the unregenerate people around us. Period…but rather reach out to them with love and compassion. We are not to walk in their ways or yoke up with their unbelief and doubt…rather to show them a better way…lead them out of darkness into light. We are not to become like them to reach them…rather to help them become like Christ as we are like Christ.

Jesus died for sinners….we are His ambassadors to this world. Let’s reach them with the power of love and righteousness…snatching them out of the fire…without being burned.

Whatcha think?

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Servolution - How to get involved.

May 13th, 2009

This is a question that I sent to Pastor Dino Rizzo of Healing Place Church in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Pastor Dino just released his book “Servolution.” It is a great resource for all Christians and local churches. Enjoy.

Dino, the book has really inspired me to get involved more on a local basis. What can you say to people like me that travel a great deal? How can we do more?

Billy - thanks for being a part of this tour and for your part in ARC - leading as you do to help us plant churches all over the nation. You’ve done so much for the Kingdom on a large scale. That makes me see this question here as such a great question.

It is important for each of us to remember that servolution - serving others - isn’t an event - it is a culture of the heart. So whether you’re on an airplane and someone’s struggling to lift a bag to the overhead storage, or someone is short on their tab at the coffee shop, or the hotel desk attendant is having a bad day, we have an opportunity to serve just by showing kindness. All we have to do is place someone else’s needs above our own comfort. Servolution happens everywhere - in the airport, in the restaurant, in the store, at the office, on the road…. Needy people are around us all the time.

Starting locally actually starts even closer in than some think. It starts in our hearts, and it reaches first to our spouse and household. We need to serve them most. It reaches to our neighbors and our community - those we encounter every day. We simply need to make the choice to engage them every day and be willing to do whatever it takes to help someone in need.

It is a heart-culture that makes us willing to set aside our own comfort and desires in order to help someone else wherever I am, wherever they are.

Dino Rizzo - Author “Servolution”

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Weighted Down by My Mistakes

May 1st, 2009

How do I deal with the emotional trauma of my mistakes?

How long to I have to be sorry for things that I have done wrong?

How many times do I have to repent?

When will the shame go away?

It seems that sin takes a huge toll on Christians when after they have found forgiveness and a new life, they make a mistake. The feeling of freedom and joy that come from forgiveness gets clouded and blotted out when we make a mistake…commit a sin. We wonder what happened. “I thought God had dealt with this in my life when I accepted Christ?” “Here I am again, falling for the same temptations…when will it end?”

It is frustrating to know that we have let God down and maybe even other believers. But it happens to all of us. So what is the key? How do we get over #1 the habit of sin, #2 the pain of sin? How do we, once and for all, get over our carnal cravings and stop obeying our flesh? Well, it is not simple, but let’s take a quick look at scripture.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:1 - 2

Sin carries with it “weight!” Weight that “clings to us,” and drags our spiritual life down, weight that bears down on our minds and spirit, weight that zaps the soul of emotional and spiritual energy and sucks it right out of us. The writer of Hebrews implores us to “lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely.” The word for “weight” in Greek literally means a mass that causes us to bend or bulge by the load. Think of it as a cancer that drains your energy and leaves you exhausted….that is what sin does to us.

So, what to do? “LAY IT DOWN!” “Sure, but how?” Three simple steps that I have learned in my life.

1. The most obvious is to “look unto Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith.” Ask Him to forgive you.

2. Forgive yourself. “Lay it down.” You made a mistake, you admit it, you are sorry, you’ve ask God to forgive you, so forgive yourself.

3. Don’t let your sin or mistake define who you are. As a follower of Jesus you are a new creation…yes you failed a test, but that is not who you are, you are a new creation in Christ Jesus.

Now, run the race set before you with your eyes on Jesus, not on your mistakes. Let grace do its work in your life. Lift up your head and thank God that He bore your sin and the shame that goes with it so you can walk in His righteousness.

Conclusion: People may not forgive you…but God has. When you carry your guilt and shame around, and bear the weight of you mistakes on your shoulders, others will see it there. But when you lay it down and live free in Christ, forgiven and restored, renewed and “weightless,” others will eventually forget your faults as well.

Try it!

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Where did God put it?

April 25th, 2009

There are so many things that people are looking for when they come to church but are not finding. Hope, freedom, peace, friends, encourage and the list goes on. Does God hide these things from people, are do we, as leaders, never really show people where they can find the promises of God? This blog entry will look at a few of these missing incredients.

Looking for the Church…where did it go?

There are millions of Christians that are staying home these days. The reasons are many. There is, however, a greater number that is present but not fulfilled. They are the faithful to attend every week, tithe or at least give some, sing the songs, pray and hope for better things. Their hopes are to find the things that brought them to church to begin with. The things you should expect from church the sermons and fellowship. But are they finding them? Here is a list of things that came up in interviews with some Christians that are faithful attendees.

This is what people are looking for in the local church but are not finding:

1. Spirituality – relationship with God-”God just doesn’t seem to attend.”

2. Connection with people. “No one greeted or welcomed us…we are new to town.”

3. Recreational involvement - “We wanted to get involved in things outside of church with other Christians but it just didn’t happen.”

4. Children’s development. “The kids learned a few songs but were mostly unchanged by their attendance.”

5. Special interest like choir, youth, to serve. “No one seemed to be interested in what we had to offer.”

6. For the teaching – in life issues. “I don’t know anymore now, after being in church for years, on how to do life than I did before I started attending.”

7. For leadership. “We wanted someone to guide us in biblical principles for life…we were looking for strong leadership…we found that the leaders only served the corporation and not the people.”

8. Counseling – life and marriage and teens. “We needed help with our marriage and teenagers. They had no answers….much less compassion.”

9. Worship and music. “I heard this music 15 years ago. No one seemed to worship the Lord…just sing familiar, worn out choruses.”

10. Business and political connections. “I wanted to connect with the business community in the church….it was difficult to find business people that were willing to connect with us.”

11. Significance. “I wanted more than just a building and a sermon, I was looking for a place to do something significant for God and for others.”

12. Alleviate guilt – obligation and duty. “I feel more guilt…more hopeless than before I stated going to church…I thought God wanted to forgive me…not just give me more rules to live by.”

13. Perpetuate tradition - My family used to go to this church. But it is so outdated that my children, as well as my husband and I have lost interest.”

14. Goes for the sake of spouse. “I brought my husband, hoping he would get engaged…he didn’t. He says he doesn’t need that and will not be back.”

15. Status and reputation. “Being part of a church helped my parents have a strong reputation in our town. Now it means little or nothing.”

16. Looking for people who actually live out their faith as examples to follow. “I work with some of the people in the church I visited. I would not want to live like them. There seems to be no one who lives a godly life away from church that I would want to follow.”

People come to church for different reasons and really want to connect. But they are not finding what they need. Make a checklist of the items above and every week ask yourself if these items can be found in your local church. If not, then week by week work on one of them until you have rediscovered every one and have implemented a plan to make them more visible to people who attend. It will amaze you how quickly things will turn around and how your church will begin to grow.

Next time:7 Reasons why We are yet Unfulfilled.

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Relationships that Work

April 18th, 2009

Someone asked one day, “How do you become so successful in all you do?” Well, I’m not sure how successful I am, but the secret to any success that I have ever had is… “I get along with people…for long periods of time.” I look at every person that I meet as a potential life-long friend. This usually ends up being a positive experience and adds to the potential of having success.

That means I had to overlook their faults, forgive their wrongs toward me, and never let hate enter into my heart. Actor Will Smith made this comment; “Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” Love lasts when the relationship comes first! Work on it.

The key to having successful relationships in any area is to have complete obedience to the Word of God. The word “relationship” means to be connected by blood or by marriage. Both of these denote covenants. We are in covenant relationship with the Lord through His blood and we are His bride. We are in covenant relationship with our spouses by marriage. We are in covenant relationship with our families by blood. We are in covenant relationship with the body of Christ through Jesus’ blood.

If we look at friendships as “covenants” we sense the importance of holding up our end of the relationship. That is extremely important in marriage. Having been married for 42 years now I notice how faithfully my wife, Charlene, keeps her covenant with me and how I strive to keep my covenant with her. The same goes with my children and grandchildren, we all have a sense that we are bound to love and serve one another.

Matthew 26:28 - “This is the blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sin.” (NIV)

God honored His part of the covenant with mankind by sending Christ into the world to “pour out His blood” for us. Wow! So what is my part? To faithfully serve Him, honor Him in all I do, and fulfill the mission He gave me in life to accomplish. I have to work at keeping my part of the covenant with God…it is not always easy.

Note: Relationships take years to cultivate, and if we are not “maintaining” and growing in relationship, they can be destroyed in a few moments. This means we work on them during the good and bad times. You learn to like someone when you can laugh together, but you can never really know deeper love until you have cried together. When you share common joy it’s great, but when you endure common sorrow together it is wonderful…in the end.

There are lots of ways to maintain strong relationships but the two most important things I think are; Faithfulness and consistent honesty.

As I look at friends and loved ones that I have deep relationships with for many years I have learned that their faithfulness and honesty with me means the most. This is the way we walk in relationship with each other. If we lie or are unfaithful to each other, we don’t deserve the relationship. I have noticed that even great men and women carry with them the burden of bad relationships. How much greater could their lives be if those relationships were healed. Most of the broken relationships are a result of unfaithfulness or dishonesty.

RELATIONSHIP WITH THE LORD: We are to “walk” in relationship with Him.

Our relationship with the Lord was intended to be like that of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden before they fell. They walked and talked with God face to face. They had a personal and physical relationship with the Lord, but when they sinned mankind was separated from God, removed from the presence of the Lord and from direct access to the blessings of God. They broke covenant by being unfaithful and then lying about it and it affected us all. But, the Lord didn’t give up on us! Through His Son Jesus, God put into motion His plan to redeem us back to Him!

This is how we can express true and faithful relationship with Jesus.

Love the Lord: Christian love has God for its primary object and expresses itself first of all in implicit obedience to his commandments. All of the law is fulfilled in one word: LOVE! Matthew 22:37 - “…Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.” I Peter 1:8 - “Whom having not seen, ye love…“

Just to give the Lord our hearts is not enough–we need to unite our whole being, heart, mind, and soul, in order to love the Lord the way he wants us to. We should express our love to the Lord by loving His word and His people. Knowing his commandments in our heads is not enough, we must keep them in our hearts also. David, in Psalms said: “your law is within my heart,” “I delight in your Law.” And we should serve one another as we walk in the Love of God.

John 14:23 - “If a man love me, he will keep my words My Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.” We live our lives in covenant with God according to His word and our relationship with Him will grow and flourish. If we continually violate what we know to be the word and will of God, our relationship with Him will wane and grow increasingly cold. On the other hand, when we walk according to His word, we have joy and closeness with the Almighty.

Bottom line - Be faithful to God, the Church and to your love ones and you will have success everywhere you go in life. At least that’s what I believe.